I have returned.
I feel like that’s just my catch phrase at this point. I always feel like I am returning somewhere, from somewhere else. I returned to London. I returned to Chicago. I returned to France. I even returned to Italy. And now I have returned to Melbourne, all shiny and new.
Continue reading “Diary of a Black Girl in Melbourne – Part 1”
I have been an extremely neglectful blog owner, I know.
Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s continue. I’m going back to Melbourne, officially. I’ve already experienced the excitement of it offline, of getting my visa finally, of booking my flights, of booking my air bnb and telling everyone I should tell, that I’m off, for good this time. I’ll be back to London, of course, because I’m always back.
Continue reading “Title pending”
I hadn’t grown my horn yet. The thing that would keep the wrong men away, the ones who fetishised and confused me for other-worldly creatures I didn’t know.
“I’ve never been with a Black Woman before.”
I am in fact, a black woman, but not the one this white Australian man was referring to when he invaded my online dating inbox. He meant a caricature, with a large backside, full lips, something tribal and aggressive about the way I dominated as the sexual huntress he imagined me to be.
Read the full story over at Black Ballad
Birthdays tend to kick up dirt, don’t they? At least they do for me. I end up tripping over anxieties I thought I had successfully buried in the previous 364 days of the year, but that one day has the power to undo all my hard work.
Continue reading “33 Things”
A lot of things have changed. It’s a new year but I haven’t done my usual round-up of the previous year in a blog post; instead I captured it in snapshot form here. I guess on the whole, I am feeling ‘a way’ about a lot of things.
Continue reading “A way”
I haven’t been updating my blog. I feel like it gets to this time of year, and this automatically happens, because I get the holiday blues. I’ve been on this Earth for 32 years and I still haven’t completely figured out why – the reasons seem to change with the years, even if one thing remains constant, which is the disconnectedness of my family. But this isn’t really about that.
Continue reading “So, here’s the real, real”
It was a ridiculous journey that I took. I was filled with optimism, hope and sadness as I boarded the plane back home, back to London after 359 days of living in Melbourne.
Continue reading “When coming home is a problem”
I’ve been thinking a lot about transitional objects, wondering whether they can change and move, at will or according to circumstance. Since coming back, mine have become fluid and almost completely out of my grasp.
Continue reading “The transitional object”
Being back is weird. Not least because I went from balmy warmth to freezing cold weather in a matter of days upon first arriving in the UK from Melbourne. But the weirdness is a ham-fisted way of describing how it feels to be back and not really ‘back’. In one way yes, I’m from here, I grew up in this country, in London; but the idea of a ‘home’ or a ‘base’ has always eluded me. Plus I’ve moved house more times than I can count.
Continue reading “The first few weeks”
OK, I realise that starting a blog post with the word “oof” sets a very specific and perhaps disappointing tone, but alas, it is an almost perfect description of how I’m feeling as I write this post. It’s not that I don’t want to write this, it’s just that I don’t really want to write it. I know that makes no sense, so let’s go back a few weeks to explain.
Continue reading “Hello. Again.”